Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Mom, I'm really sorry you saw my naked ex-boyfriend in the living room this morning. I can explain....but I'd rather just stick with this apology and be done with it
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
Randomize