Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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