if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
