There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Randomize
