I got a call from 999 999 9999. I didn't answer it because I was too busy freaking out about the number.
It was probably Jesus.
I feel like he would have left a message.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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