Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
