So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
