is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
If I die, sorry about rent.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize
