return my video game
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
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