It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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