I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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