Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
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