two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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