"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I'm rearranging all my life goals to become a billionaire by 28 and batman by 30. Not kidding.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize