i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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