and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
i've created a new STD.
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
This can only be settled by a dance off.
It was a successful conference for my sales and my sex life. Those are probably related
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