I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Randomize
