i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
