I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
