D3 body, D1 cock
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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