Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Randomize
