he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
