I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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