Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
