we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Randomize
