Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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