Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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