i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
So apparently I’m into choking now
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
