my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
porn star boner night. come get it.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
I distinctly remember calling the anesthesiologist a "sneaky little bastard" directly to his face
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
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