i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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