dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
Randomize
