she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
My vagina is officially offended.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize