Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Randomize
