HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
he puts the penis in happiness.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Literally the only reason we didnt get arrested was because the cop said I reminded him of Steve Stifler from American Pie
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
