i just google imaged poop.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
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