I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize
