question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
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