he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Randomize