But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Randomize
