Grow some girl-balls and come out already
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize
