She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
