Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Randomize
