well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
Randomize
