:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
