break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
i don't like sucking hair
But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Randomize
