just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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