I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
