so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
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