Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
This gyro tastes like lonliness
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Randomize
