I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
Randomize
