It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
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